Dirty Feet

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about washing feet.  I’ve been imagining what it would have been like to have Jesus kneel before me, take my feet, and lovingly wash the dirt and grim off them.  I want to say it would have been a beautiful and moving experience.  I want to say I would have been deeply touched. I want to give the “right” answer, but the only thing I can think about is how uncomfortable I would have been.  

Accepting help from others has always been hard for me.  I don’t like admitting that there are things I can’t do on my own. I have juggled strollers and babies, rather than asking someone to open the door for me.  I have felt resentful of my husband, rather than just asking for help with the kids.  I have alienated friends, rather than asking to talk through a hard time.  For some reason, I feel like I have something to prove to the world.  I think there’s probably a word for this sickness….oh yeah, it’s called PRIDE.

A couple years ago, I was struggling pretty intensely with some emotional issues.  It took me months to work up my courage to start seeing a therapist.  Even then, I was mortified if someone found out I was receiving help.  I felt like people would think less of me.  That asking for help meant I wasn’t good enough to handle things on my own.  Looking back, I can see how wrong I was.  Getting help through a hard time didn’t mean I wasn’t good enough, it means I was strong and humble enough to let someone else serve me. It means I was able to admit my feet are dirty too.

“He came to Simon Peter, who said to Him, ‘Master, are you going to wash my feet?’ Jesus answered and said to him, ‘What I am doing, you do not understand now, but you will understand later.’ Peter said to Him, ‘You will never wash my feet.’ Jesus answered him, ‘Unless I wash you, you will have no inheritance with me.”

Jesus washed feet because they were dirty.  We all have issues and sins we struggle with.  We all have things that hold us back from living the holy lives God wants from us.  We all have dirty feet. I think Jesus’ teaching about washing feet is definitely about learning to serve others, but also about letting others serve you as well.  We need the humility that comes from letting someone else kneel before us, take our feet in their hands, and let the water wash away the filth and muck picked up on this journey.  We can’t do it alone.  We are called to live in community with other Christians because we need one another.